I've started a blog.
I'm going to be somewhat honest with you. I don't know what this blog is going to be about. I can't say I read the news beyond Yahoo's home page, and I don't have a television set so..... current events and pop culture are out. Inspirational quotes make me irrationally violent and self-help gurus makes me queasy, so expectations of enlightenment are probably out of the question. Food blogs are a dime a dozen, not to mention my iphone photos are unappetizing at best....
HOLD UP. Lets not get all caught up in what this blog is lacking, but instead focus on some of the gems it is sure to offer the wayward reader.
1- Sarcasm and snarky commentary about anyone and everyone.
2-Pictures of my cats. Because my cats are cuter than your cats times infinity.
3- Liberal use of the word retarded.
4- Overheard conversations of people who are smarter/funnier than I.
5- The occasional Haiku.
6- Various complaints and grievances.
7- etc.
Who knows? Some days I may just post a tally of how many red skittles I ate versus the number of yellow ones. I Just. Dont. Know.
red skittles: 5
yellow skittles: 3
(obviously I don't count the purple ones because they're f-ing gross)
What it really boils down to is that I really just needed another time-vampire to bleed my employers pockets dry because Facebook just wasn't cuttin it. I mean, have you been on there? It's all about OTHER people and their 'interests' and their 'comments' and their 'photos' of them doing awesome cool things that they never ever invited me to but expect me to give them a thumbs up on. What's up with that? Thumbs down.
See. Aren't you glad you tuned in?
